PLEASE READ THESE TERMS:
STEPH MADAMBA Thursday, December 21, 2006
have mixed emotions today. actually, for most of the day, i was actually thinking it's such a beautiful day but wat the hell?! turned out just the same at the end. wala parin palang nag.bago. it was all just an act. or was it? eto na naman ako, pag nabasa niya, unfair na naman ako or i didn't understand.. hmm. well, maybe it was wasn't but still, it didn't change a thing. we still ain't fine. im counting days and yes, im still counting them..
what do i have to do to put things back where they were in the first place anyway? i never thought this could happen..
well, let's start with the 'most part of the day that's happy'. har. i saw him again after two long weeks.. i didnt act so bitchy ok.. i approached and said hi. we even sat together and we were fine the whole day. then the 'not so happy part of the day'.. i actually thought this was the beginning but who would have thought that by getting out of that door would bring it back to weirdness and speechless time.. maybe if i went to the concert, it would have been different.. sori naman.. nagkagulo sa bahay. god make me forget his no. please... erased nga fonebuk, no difference since i know it by heart.. hate it. then again, let's make room for some mistakes.. baka pagod or la time to look at fone.. who am i kidding?! oh yes, just me.
im beginning to be hopeless.. i only have like 1 percent left in my system. going back was a decision i made because of him, for him and for myself. but now, im thinking if what i did was right? for the both of us.. it's obviously not doing me any good... grades and falling apart, losing my mind, and heart, lost a friend, lost the self i once had for 6 years.... as for him, i know he's bothered all the time. so obvious naman no.
..partly happy partly angry partly sad partly weird... hay.. can't even describe my life right now. hope this christmas would give me something i want, need.. something for me..
what do i have to do to put things back where they were in the first place anyway? i never thought this could happen..
well, let's start with the 'most part of the day that's happy'. har. i saw him again after two long weeks.. i didnt act so bitchy ok.. i approached and said hi. we even sat together and we were fine the whole day. then the 'not so happy part of the day'.. i actually thought this was the beginning but who would have thought that by getting out of that door would bring it back to weirdness and speechless time.. maybe if i went to the concert, it would have been different.. sori naman.. nagkagulo sa bahay. god make me forget his no. please... erased nga fonebuk, no difference since i know it by heart.. hate it. then again, let's make room for some mistakes.. baka pagod or la time to look at fone.. who am i kidding?! oh yes, just me.
im beginning to be hopeless.. i only have like 1 percent left in my system. going back was a decision i made because of him, for him and for myself. but now, im thinking if what i did was right? for the both of us.. it's obviously not doing me any good... grades and falling apart, losing my mind, and heart, lost a friend, lost the self i once had for 6 years.... as for him, i know he's bothered all the time. so obvious naman no.
..partly happy partly angry partly sad partly weird... hay.. can't even describe my life right now. hope this christmas would give me something i want, need.. something for me..