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STEPH MADAMBA Tuesday, August 30, 2005
hay! sem break na nga tlga.. its really a lot of rest pero im also a little bored na..buti nlng im preparing for my birthday this saturday kaya medjo masaya rin..preparing it is fun nmn eh.. i have things to do with my time.. im really excited na for my debut party.. im gonna see most of my friends..friends in college, friends in high school, friends from choir, and friends from different sects..hay! family pa pala! hahaha..almost forgot..hehe..anyways..paid already the downpayment for grilla kanina and everything's set na for the event..ako nlng and that day..one last thing missing nlng pala..my guestbook....hahaha..looking forward for everyday coming...im turning 18 on thursday! haha..finally!
Sunday, August 28, 2005
august 18, 2005..hay nako! anthrop finals is done and it so so so suck! bwisit tlga..babagsak ako! half of my papaer was blank! no exag to ah..true!august 19, 2005..finals sa p.e. ang saya! we got a 4.0! high among the rest..love ballroom dancing na..we had plus points kc kami lng ang may costume and naiiba sa iba..haha..group mates: lawrence, hung, jing, amber, henzel, mayan, jess..ang saya!
august 21, 2005..studying for international studies exam the following day..hindi ko alam na ung 2 articles sa report lng ang kasali! i studied the handouts! naka 3 chapters nako before ko nalaman! hay! bagsak na!
august 22, 2005..finals na sa international studies..ang tindi! un lng masasabi ko...get niyo na siguro yon..dia, marsh, shara, eunice, jing, and me went to glorietta after since sobrang nakakadrain ung exam eh..haha..g4 and then timezone! haha..
august 23, 2005..finals sa relsone(theology)..ang dali! i love it! went to my high school afterwards with henzel and kung kelan naman kami dumalaw sa csr, dun pa walang pasok! hay! we went to power plant nlng and bought a bag..haha..
august 24, 2005..no more exams! meaning, sembreak na! haha..yey! except that may ipapasa lang akong final paper for critical thinking on friday! panira!
august 26, 2005..puyat na naman from last night since tinapos ko ung paper! went to school and made chika to my friends while passing the paper and waiting for the release of course cards sa international studies class! i passed! 2.5! nakapasa ako! i can apply for majors sa 3rd term! yey! it made my day! car pool kami kay shara..she took us home(pao and me)!..went through long taft avenue looking for a uturn slot! haha..because of that, nakabili kami ng wendy's! frosty ever!
august 28, 2005..today! wala lng..finalized my cake for birthday..busy preparing for my debut party..haha..calling people for reminders! haha..im excited! happy birthday to me on thurs!
'ciao
Sunday, August 14, 2005
hay nako..tiring day... just came from marsh's place to do report in instudi class...hirap! wala akong maintindihan sa article! enough about that...something shocking happened tonight... jek called me up...jek as in eric..mygod! a couple of years have passed since the time that we spoke to each other.. ok lng nmn..hmmm.. i don't really know.. there are things that he said that sort of bothered me and made me think of what happened before... i told him i wasn't comfortable and he assumed that i couldn't let go of the past! like duh?! may past ba?? he answered in such a way that he made me think..was there a past? sabi niya i didn't believe him daw before...it was true...i didn't.. i did not believe in anything that he said before. i thought that everything that he says are just plain "panloloko" and just to practice his charisma to girls..i don't really know.. could he be serious? y do i even bother right? im making myself think so much of things that are so unpredictable. well, eric...if there will be any chance of you peaking out onto my blog, dont be mad of what i have written down ayt? these are just thoughts i want to write in.. it's also good that you're back.. i miss the old times din naman.. pwede ka na punta dito house after my finals..chill
Thursday, August 11, 2005
what a wednesday that henzel, abby and i had yesterday!! my friends and i skipped relsone! you know why? because we went to kamuning with other friends! so stupid tlaga! it was university break and so we went to chowking and ate our lunch there..bob and jc (henzel's bf and friend) were going to meet us up..i only know bob and not jc..nung dumating sila, sabi ni jc na pupunta pa xang kamuning to meet his groupmates because they have a meeting about dance and they have to take a picture of the group! just for a picture, he has to go! wat an excuse! he's so kalog tlga! naloka ako tlga! tapos biglang nagkayayaan na to go to kamuning with him! ung mga boys naman, parang sira, very encouraging! encouraging us the girls to skip our next and last class! relsone pa! haaaay! kami nmn, parang sira, pumayag! naexcite pa kamo! henzel, abby and me..galing ng mga isip no?? hahaha...and so we went..lrt...lrt2...and taxi....haba ng route no?? hahaha..para kaming sira sa lrt...wanna know y? lrt was so puno! when the train came na, gusto ni jc na dun sa pinakaunahan pumasok kc daw di daw puno dun like the rest of the parts of the train..hindi nga nmn tlga puno pero hinarang kami ng guard, pang senior citizens lng pala un! hahah..pahiya kami..most especially jc! pag pasok nmin, para kaming magkakasya sa puno...dikit2 kaming lima at naghawak kamay pa! parang "our father" sa mass! e c jc may dalang black notebook, inangat ba nmn! para na kaming napprayer meeting tuloy! tawa kami ng tawa! kami lang ata ang maingay dun eh..hahahhaha..i can still imagine! we were like children who got so fond of the game we were playing! then sa recto, lrt2 nman...maluwag ung tren kc first station eh pero pag pasok nmin, para kaming hindi magkakakilala! biglang nahiwalayan at nagpaunahan sa mauupuan! it's as if we dont know each other! hay! pagdating dun, hindi pa niya alam kung papano pumunta dun sa house nung friend niya..while walking, nagtatanong pa siya to people on how to go..grbe! from jeep naging taxi! nagpractice pa xa ng speech kung bakit siya 5 hours late! may lbm daw xa and pagnatanong bakit kmi ksma, nakita lng dw niya kmi sa gateway! ang kupal..nagbilliards nlng kami nila bob, henzel and abby..walang kwentang lakad! umuwi nlng din kami and went dito sa house ko..they stayed for a while and left also..the next day, sinabi nlng samin na they discussed a lot in rels and that we have a test the next meeting...badtrip! nako jc, sisingilin tlga kita! hahahaha...joke lng...stressing!!!!! i loooooooooove it!!
Saturday, August 06, 2005
aaaarrrggh! i dont know what i've been thinking of lately..bakit ganito? im sad and i dont know exactly why.. i saw ur account yesterday, i cant understand the feeling..nagseselos ba ako? who's c***? a**** pa ang tawagan ah? (see? i told u i seem to be nagseselos!) aaarrggh! palagi keo magkausap? when? after me? how? if kausap kita the whole time... i dont know what to think na..i dont even have the right which is exactly why i dont understand myself...i haven't even thought about me liking you..hindi ko naisip yon coz sabi ko nga, hindi pwede bcoz of j***.. ano ba to?! i cant even set my thoughts right na.. i enjoy ur company, yes i do..very much.. pero lately, something is wrong.. naisip ko nmn na baka it's just me..i should understand, malamang exams and i do pero y is it that i feel awkward na when we're talking? parang there's always something that comes between.. tapos kanina, i dropped by ur account agen and i felt worse..i saw another one..and so i wanted to know who she is, i dropped by her account nmn..yes, she's pretty..maybe u like her..it's obvious nmn sa mga sinabi mo dun about her..i saw that ur very fond of her..it hurts me and i dont like the feeling..what should i do? i should not even feel this way..wala lng naman tayong dalawa eh, we're just friends.. if that' s the case, then why does it hurt so much?! much worse is that, i cant even ask you about it..baka mapahiya lang ako..god do i hate this feeling! ang tanga ko talaga, i should have seen this coming but i refused on staying on to reality..hindi tayo pwede.. pero bakit nga ba ulit? i gave myself the reasons but now, i wish i just didn't give and set the reasons from the very beginning..hindi mo nmn alam un eh..ako lang..it's always been just me..i just felt on writing it here sa blog para malabas ko lng..also the place i know you'd not peek in to..what am i gonna do now? should i give space? un ba ang kailangan? hindi na nga tayo maxado naguusap eh..should i wait until matapos ang exams and see what would happen? or should i just let you go now before i feel worse? pano pag mali ako and it's just me that is getting histerical? i told you na kc before na wag kang magiging maxadong mabait sakin and sweet eh, lalo na at palagi mo akong pinapatawa..i told you not to because i know that sooner or later, may mangyayari..wat did i expect? u still did and now, i dont know what to do..my god steph! ano ba tong ginagawa mo?!i dont know kung gusto ko tong mabasa mo or not..actually, at this point, i dont really know now what i want and what i should do exactly..should i wait or act now? if i wait, maybe it would be too late and u get fond of her so much but if i act now, maybe i just had wrong assumptions..pakita ka nga ng signs..lord help me..heart? can u just stop beating for the same reason? kahit ngayon lng? nahihirapan lng ako..nahihirapan na talaga ako..hindi ako dpat magselos, hindi ako dapat magselos, hindi ako dapat magselos! hindi dapat! but i think i am..i am.. sweet015